"I can't not give you the Strib."

This tickled my funny bone rather a lot today. From Shot in the Dark:

So when Comcast called the other day asking if I'd be interested in getting a very good deal on the first three months of premium cable and that yes, I could block MTV and Nick, I thought "Hmmmmm...". It was a nice price.

And then the guy on the phone said "You also get x weeks of the Minneapolis Star/Tribune thrown in on the deal". The Strib is apparently trying to gussy up their circulation numbers by giving the paper away.

MITCH: "Could I get the deal without the Strib?"

GUY: "Er, no, I can't not give you the Strib".

MITCH: "I want the deal, just not the Strib."

GUY: "You could take the deal and just throw the paper away..."

MITCH: "Nice thought, but it's wasteful, and I don't want to give them any more subscribers. I can't stand their editorial policies, or their editorial writers. You sure you can't just detach the Strib from the deal?"

GUY: "I'm sorry, no".

MITCH: "Dang. I'm going to have to decline the deal."

GUY: "Because of the Strib?"

MITCH: "I'm afraid so."

He seemed kind of confused.